Review, tuna (39p)

Ive been feelin a bit jumpy as I hadn’t written this review up yet and I meant to do it ages ago after everyone was so nice about my review of gravy.

But I have to go and catch the bus in a bit to pick up Baby Candice Junior off the foster carer she has been with since when I left her up the hospital yesterday. Aww bless her, anyway the foster carer loves her to bits so she won’t mind another half an hour or so, lol. And she wanted to watch hollyoaks. I hope u wont be too worried about me and baby Candice jr - I can sky Plus hollyoaks, but I do need to beack in time for don’t forget the lyrix.

I would of written this up today but Orlando and Destiny went and spewed, they ate all my Rustlers burgers while me and jamal were up the hospital having my ass seen to (makes a change lol) but thing is they never bloody cooked them. And to top it all yesterday Destinys teacher rang as she had been bunking off (Destiny not her teacher lol) and they’d found her in the kentukcy. I know she has been dying to get back in there since she had that incident with the toilet brush but one lot of campalobacter in the one day is enough for anyone.  So Ive sent her out for some fags while I write this up, hope she doesn’t shit herself again on the way back. There are only so many gussets a mummy can turn inside out.

Talking of gussets, better get back to the tuna, LOL.

My review is of Netto tuna. I like Netto because Fergie, the Princess of Wales, shops there. I saw her on the telly, she was kind (and not half as fat as she used to be but still a bit mad) and went to netto for this family and told them not to be such fat bastards. After six weeks they were still fat bastards but they had some nice clothes and they had their hair done so their faces didn’t look so fat. The woman had hairy legs though, but at least they weren’t grey like the ones on jamals back.

I also wanted to write about this tuna as its a bit special and is 1p dearer than the asda (chavsda lol) version. You have to push the boat out sometimes, don’t you. I saved the penny in our jar for when me granddad comes round, hes saving for some vigara, what with me nan being “away.”

My first impressiions of the tuna was that it had a blue tin. When you opened it it was a brown colour with some black bits in and it smelled like jamals fingers but not as bad as his ring.*

The thing is with tins you never no wot youll find,  me mate Gemmas auntie opened some tomatos once and they were all wrapped in condoms but then once I found a dead spider in destinys ready brek so its not just tins. I hope Im not poisoned by the tuna as you can get a disease and die from tuna, next time jamal can try it.

The tuna tasted ok I suppose and not like I was going to be pioisoned lol, I put loads of vinegar on and mashed up a pickled egg in it after I nicked them from the chippy.  I gave some to the kids with a broken jammy dodger for their pudding, it was a nice meal and Id give it 4 stars out of 5.  (It lost one cos of the smell.) Ive saved some for tomorrow too, so it is good value, serving three of us and the cat twice. I didn’t give any to jamal, I think he had his fill at number 9.

 (*Um, the one he dropped down the drain the other week, careless bastard, bet his hands were slippy from number 9. ) 

Ingredients: tuna (fish) water salt

Allergy advice: fish