Jamal gave me a tenner so I went to Asda to get some smart price biscuits and a Take a Break. The kids were at school so it were just me and Baby Candice Junior. It's nice when we can get out together, even if it is just to the Asda.
Sat on the bus I read me Take A Break about that man who fell in love with a goat and that old lady who thought she were related to Prince Phillip but he were avin none of it, she was from Greece too. Then I got to readin about that woman who stole her friends man and had a baby with im. Even though the piccy was blurred I thought it looked like that cow next door.
Anyways, I was readin real slow so that I could sound out the letters in me head when I realised we were at our stop. I jumped up and got off just in time. I love getting off the bus cos it means I can ave a ciggie.
I got ome and there was this phonecall. Some stupid woman from the bus depot sayin she'd found Baby Candice Junior in er buggy on the bus. I didn't thank er, interfering old bag. Good job I put that necklace round Baby Candice Junior's neck with me name and number on it after the last time. The police dropped er off a bit later, she were still asleep.
I were glad to get me smart price biscuits back, they went right nice with me cup of tea.
returned unharmed.
ReplyDeleteperfect!
BTW... added your refreshing blog to my blogroll. xx
That buggy area on a bus is designed for you to leave the baby. Didn't the interfering old bag realise that!
ReplyDeleteGreat idea to put your name and address on round the kid’s neck. Have just done the same, except I put next doors number because I think she likes my kids more than me.
ReplyDeleteI've tattooed it on mine. Only thing is we changed the number, so now I got to get out the sewing needles and pens again.
ReplyDelete